Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize