"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
