Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Randomize
