what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
