laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Help. Why am I so naked?
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