Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Welp...herpes.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I wear drunk well.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
