i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
