Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize