Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
