I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
