I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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