You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I am naked and annoyed.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
