Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
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