I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
