Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
