He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize