she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
