You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
