She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize