he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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