Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
