we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He passed out mid-signature
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
