Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
