he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
