physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize