Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
