weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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