I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
