who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
