I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
