I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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