i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
My friends, they love my intelligence
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
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