My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
