I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
