oh fat girl friday strikes again...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
