i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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