I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize