There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
