did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
