i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Randomize
