Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize
