Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
