yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
