he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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