I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
