Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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