i don't like sucking hair
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
