you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
