i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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