What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
