he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
